Dear Family 'n Friends –
My
92 year old Dad, Ralph
Arensmeier, went home to be with Jesus
Saturday afternoon,
Dad
had started a physical
deterioration on Saturday of the previous
week. The nurse at the Health
Center of FriendsView
Retirement Community,
where Dad 'n Mom have lived for the past 16
years called me to tell me of their
desire to transport Dad to the local hospital
for
"rehydration."
I
asked if they were aware of the
fact that both Dad 'n Mom had each signed
documents stating that they didn't
want any "heroic measures" taken to keep them
alive, including the
declining of rehydration. The nurse said
that they knew that, but wanted
to check with the family. I told her
that Dan and I (along with Jan)
loved and honored my Dad sufficiently
that we knew what his desires were and would
honor them.
Dan
and I talked several times on
Saturday, the 11th of January, and agreed that
we should both show up in
Jan
and
I drove from
Dad
was very pleased to see Dan, and
we all had a good time, and rejoiced over the
fact that soon Dad's faith would
become fact; his hope a reality.
In
all of this it must be said that
Mom was quite quiet since a series of
strokes in November and December
have left her quite mentally
debilitated. She does speak, but very
slowly
and with little emotion. For
those of you who ever met my mom, you
know that that is highly unusual.
On
Monday evening, we were joined by
our family pastor and friends from our days
together in
"Uncle
Clark" as
he was known to Dan and me as
young boys, very tenderly ministered to Mom 'n
Dad, Dan, Jan and me, and
we were blessed as he concluded their visit
with the reading of that wonderful
song of the singing shepherd king of Israel,
Psalm 23, and prayed for us all.
Jan
flew back to
Wednesday
afternoon, dad spoke his
last words on this earth. Dan
and I had
lunched with mom, and as I rolled her back
into their room in her wheelchair, I
rolled her next to dad’s bed. She
tenderly reached her right hand out and laid
it on dad’s left hand as he was
lying on his right side. He
opened his
eyes, and while softly, yet distinctly he
looked her in the eyes and said, “I love
you.” I
don’t think it gets much better than
that!
The
week proceeded with contacts
with Hospice (quite possibly the closest
people to angels most of us will ever
see in this life), the arrangements of what to
do when Dad actually dies, and
during their rather substantial naps more than
a few games of pool in the
activities area of the retirement
center. Dan is disgustingly good, but
we had fun in spite of his overwhelming
superiority on the pool table.
Of
course, when Arensmeiers get
together, there's normally a laugh or two . .
. would you believe a lot of
it!? This was no exception.
Finally,
on Saturday afternoon,
while the nurse (Paula)
was attending and we were all talking quietly,
Dan said, "Stop."
We observed
what he had:
Dad had stopped
breathing.
The
nurse checked his heart with the
stethoscope and agreed that he was gone.
Dan was closest to Dad's head,
and gently cradled it, and quietly
cried. I was seated on the bed near
Dad's knees, and was holding his left hand in
mine, amazed at the life of this
godly man with whom we had spent such
wonderful years; who had been the greatest
mentor and example of what walking with Jesus
meant, and . . . all of a sudden,
he gasped and inhaled a great breath and
finally let it all out!
Dan
and I immediately laughed.
It was as though Dad had had the last laugh,
and conveyed, "I gotcha . . . one last
time!"
I
told Mom, who was in the next bed,
"Your sweetheart of
68 1/2 years has gone to be
with Jesus." Her quiet,
contemplative response (with quite a
smile) was, "Well, Praise the Lord."
That's about as much response
as we received over the next couple of days.
Saturday
night, at Shireen's
instigation, Jan and Shireen arrived* at
Jan
read, from a favorite volume of
ours, the Redpath Library of Universal
Literature (which we’d seen
before we were even engaged in Oklahoma City,
Oklahoma, and which I bought for
Jan as an engagement gift on December 24th
1962), the following:
From
the writings of
George Washington Doane, an American clergyman
and poet, born at
WHAT
IS THAT, MOTHER?
“What
is that,
Mother?”---
“The Lark, my child:---
The
morn has but just
looked out and smiled,
When
he starts from his
humble, grassy nest,
And
is up and away,
with the dew on his breast,
And
a hymn in his heart
to yon pure bright sphere,
To
warble it out in his
Maker’s ear.
Ever, my child, be thy morn’s first
lays
Tuned, like the Lark’s, to thy Makers
praise.”
“What is that,
Mother?”
---
“The Dove, my son,
And that low,
sweet
voice, like the widow’s moan,
Is flowing out
from her
gentle breast,
Constant and
pure, by
that lonely nest,
As the wave is
poured
out from some crystal urn,
For
the
distant dear one’s quick return.
Ever, my son,
be thou like the
Dove. ---
In friendship as
faithful, as constant
in love.”
“What is that,
Mother?”
---
“The Eagle, boy,
Proudly
careering in
his course of joy;
Firm, in his own
mountain vigor relying;
Breasting the
dark
storm, the red bolt defying;
His wing on the
wind,
and his eye on the sun,
He swerves not a
hair, but
bears onward---right on
Boy, bay the Eagle’s flight ever by
thine,
Onward and
upward---true to the line.”
“What is that,
Mother?”
---
“The Swan, my love:---
He is floating
down
from his native grove.
No loved one
now, no
nestling nigh;
He is floating
down by
himself to die.
Death darkens
his eye,
it unplumes his
wings,
Yet the sweetest
song
the last he sings.—
Live so, my love, that when death shall
come,
Swan-like and sweet, it may waft thee
home.”
|
As Dad had
been a lifelong Gideon, and
therefore had distributed thousands
of Gideon Bibles, gifts could be
made by providing Gift
Bibles through the Gideons
International at their secure web
site:
https://www.gideons.org/_mem_bin/FormsLogin.asp?/tginet/donationsmemorialbeta.cfm If you do
that, each bible placed is normally
seen by over 140 people during its
lifetime, and a nice card will be
sent to Mom. |
|
|
Yours,
In Christ,
tim 'n jan . . . rejoicing
over Dad's "Promotion!"
(. . . while
being keenly aware of the
fact that we'll not have privilege of seeing
him anymore on this plain.)
*Shireen had been in
(Another “relaxing” weekend
in the life of the Arensmeiers .
. .)
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